avoidence of responsibilities

Well, that title probably describes this semester in total for me. Among the responsibilities I have avoided over the last 4 months were my classes and the work associated with them. That definitely includes this journal/blog, which I had hoped would have encouraged me to keep up with the readings (fat chance) or at least pay more attention to what I did read or what was said in class. Obviously, it failed to force me to keep up on the readings, as I failed to complete any of the readings this semester, a first for me personally, and not something I am proud of. (However, I do wish to finish Snow, if only to see how Ka manages to screw it all up.) I really wish I could say that it was simply that the reading was extra hard, or that I was disinterested, but instead I can only point the finger at myself for being both over ambitious in my semester class distribution, and unmotivated to do well at anything involving effort. As anyone who has bothered to read this blog (I'm sorry) can attest, I've been rather random in both my update times and subjects, but that has reflected my mind state this semester. Even now I am doing this instead of something else that I need to focus upon, but I guess it just means I get to pull another all-nighter. Anyways, on to what this is supposed to be about, what I learned this semester, I think.

This semester I have learned that I must be more careful about how I speak in class so as to not mislead others into thinking I'm a terrible human being (I would like to clear this up here and now for good: I DON'T SUPPORT GENOCIDE OR SUICIDE!!!) or a giant prick. I have been known to think too much or to reach too far for my arguments, but eh, whatever. After all, it's a little late to try to change that, now isn't it? I also learned that the English habit of degrading others didn't become as obvious until after they had learned about how to build and maintain an empire from the Ottoman empire. It's kinda funny that these people would learn so much and then dump all over their teachers, without thinking about what that says about themselves. I don't know if that makes sense, but whatever, my night is just starting. There is more I have learned from this class, but I can't individualize or de-integrate any of it and put it into coherent or real words here, so I'll just finish by saying that I already miss the class and everybody in it, even the people that drove me nuts.


Peace